I found an old switch and a 5m ethernet cable in my closet! I must've taken it from the pile of tech left behind by this one particularly careless nonprofit my last agency took over for. There was even security footage on one of the desktops. This is why you hire people like me for your nonprofit, by the way.
Anyway, gonna get to have fun rewiring my lab today! My reverse proxy is also finally on ethernet as a result (yes it wasn't before, shut up) so #
WotW your requests should actually be a little bit faster now.